You never realize how squeaky the floors of your house are until you try to carry a sleeping child to bed.
One day you wake up and your kid suddenly became able to move so fast – like Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon fast. She can wiggle out of a diaper or grab a spoon so quickly it is ridiculous. In our house diaper changing has become akin to the calf roping competition in a rodeo.
Easter candy is the best candy of the whole year.
Easter and my birthday should not be so close together. Between my birthday cake and Easter candy, Spring should be called “The Time of Year Sarah Gains 10 Pounds.”
The next time we buy a new couch I am totally paying extra to buy the kind that have the chaise section on one end. I’ve been doing a lot of couch sleeping at night with Abby lately I have to have something more comfortable than this before we ever have another kid.
I always picture Donald Trump in the White House as Biff Tannen in his Casino in Back to the Future II.
The other day I was telling my coworkers about how incredibly forgetful I am lately and how I always thought “mom brain” was just something silly that people made up. I warned them that at the rate I am going I may show up to work without a shirt some day. They laughed, but I was dead serious.
I never thought it was possible to fall asleep standing up… until I caught myself starting to nod off standing and rocking my baby to sleep.
Sometimes when we are looking at the 100 First Words book and I am making all of the animal sounds for Abby I say “Aflac” when it comes to the white duck instead of “quack.” I am waiting for the day when she says “Aflac,” too.